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    "The Comedy Album" is the 13th and most epic Kleenex Girl Wonder record.

    26 songs, covering a variety of genres, styles, and production methods, written and recorded over the course of two years, and now available on two slabs of strikingly coloured vinyl (some 'Comedy Blue,' some 'Bazooka Joke Pink').

    Featuring guest production from Max Tundra, Saskrotch, and The Hood Internet, plus the usual suspects of Graham Smith, Matt LeMay and Thayer McClanahan.

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I don't know. What to say
or where to go from here.
It's clear; the roads are closed,
the train takes twenty years to show up, and
why do I shrink every time I grow up? Why do I drink?

Every time I throw up. I joked
and poked ya till you woke up.
La cosa nostra slowly broke up. Look closer.
Gain composure. I know if I was your cynosure,
I'd break frame with a fucking flamethrower.
I take the blame. You win. Game over.

We all – In the end,
we all die young.
The hot & cold, the calm
& high-strung.
Doesn't matter who you are
or where you come from.
What's a man gotta do to starve
in this paradise of food,
folks, and fun?

We all die young...

Yeah, no, sure, fine: “Your clothes hurt.” Bye.
Gimme five for the “will keep self alive.”
Lemme drive – Penicillin and a penny for your eye.
End up killin' time instead of what you meant to,
but it's nice. Really? Why? Tell a story, silly; cry.
“Selfish editors and foolish foley artists fill the sky
will he, nil he, and to die? Perchance to dawdle like a
millipede and caterwaul in misery at all this life has given
me.” I guess reading William Self just made him want to kill himself.
And I can't blame him. And I can't tell if it's sad, or true, or just as well.

We all – In the end,
we all die young.
And we're all too old, too,
and too fucked up to
ever nut the fuck up
or even buck the fuck up.
In interviews you say you're “on the come up.”
Come on, shut up.
Let me tell you what's up:
the sky. It's dyed blue. Why? Dude, you suck.
I tried to imply life is short, you're just dumb.
We all, in the end,
we all die young…


from The Comedy Album, released October 28, 2016


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Kleenex Girl Wonder New York, New York

A prolific songwriter, a cracking tight independent indie rock band for live entertainment, and a fine art parody magazine about what computers think about human thoughts about their fine art

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