The Wackiest Prank of All Time

from The Comedy Album by Kleenex Girl Wonder

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"The Comedy Album" is the 13th and most epic Kleenex Girl Wonder record.

26 songs, covering a variety of genres, styles, and production methods, written and recorded over the course of two years, and now available on two slabs of strikingly coloured vinyl (some 'Comedy Blue,' some 'Bazooka Joke Pink').

Featuring guest production from Max Tundra, Saskrotch, and The Hood Internet, plus the usual suspects of Graham Smith, Matt LeMay and Thayer McClanahan.

Includes unlimited streaming of The Comedy Album via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Poor Thing!, Losel Vila, Let it buffer. Forever, BLP, Ponyoak 20th Anniversary Edition, Past Blasts, cocolopez, White Lacuna, and 17 more. , and , .
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lyrics

She had a torso like the chassis of a Datsun,
but her vernacular was awesome.
Her hair was Franzia, her eyeballs were like saucers,
but her mind was like at least as dark as Chaucer's. And I lost her

‘cause where I hung my head was my home.
There's scared, and there's dead, and there's old and alone.
But these days flair is all the rage;
it's all millefiori and colonnades.

Love can lift you up,
but it's not enough
to get you what
you want.
It's rough,
I grant you.
I wish that I had you
But I had to give you up...

Like Stephen Malkmus hates Spiral Stairs
but no one really wants to take it there.
I read in a newspaper life ain't fair.
Also, everyone needs a dollar.

And we've been through all this a thousand times:
ditch the euphemistic aphorisms and lousy rhymes,
do something worthwhile, and be proud.
I wonder why the wackiest prank is being honest.

And you can laugh as you watch us
tearing up the village green.
We'll set up shop in your subconscious
and fill your heads with dreams
the likes of which you'll never see!

Love can lift you up,
but it's like a drug –
you can never get enough
of that buzz.
It's dumb,
but the alternative
is nothing or too much.
So I guess I'll give you up

to a roulette wheel and a fool that can deal
with the cruel unfeeling facade,
twice shod in your stiletto heels
and your steel-belted wheels
so you can ride for real or just walk

right into my heart,
knife twisting my arm –
slight miss, but you're warm –
I'm digging your charms:
all glistening lipstick, stickers and yarn.
All mysteries solved.
I'm listening...

Love can lift you up
like a crutch,
so you can hover above
the chaos you came from.
Love can lift you up,
but it's tough to judge
something as ubiquitous
as the sun.
Love can lift you up,
yes, but
are you prepared to plunge
to the earth for someone?
You're nuts. I get you.
That's not the issue.
Is all I can give you enough?